Skip Wiley had a well-known theory that the quality of life declined in direct proportion to the Asshole Quotient. According to Wiley’s reckoning, Miami had 134 total assholes per square mile, giving it the worst A.Q. in North America. In second place was Aspen, Colorado (101), with Malibu Beach, California, finishing third at 97. Creative…
by Litigiously Philly… “I’ve been watching a lot of TV lately. Go figure. All these attacks. Everywhere. It got me to thinking: If that rabble-rouser with the comb-over can go on and on about suing everybody, why can’t I? Makes sense to me. The thing is, I’ve got a real case.” Read the whole indefensible…
by Rock N Rolly Philly… I’m from the Rock N Roll Universe. Ever heard of it? It’s a place where nothing else matters except the music. Rock N Roll music. One night in the Rock N Roll Universe a woman awoke to her baby crying. “Damn kids!” she cursed. “This is it,” she told her…
by Fanatically Philly… After the EURO 2016 soccer riots in France, UEFA officials decided to do something about it. While some cited economic woes as the cause, handing out wads of cash was quickly voted down. What they did wind up proposing seemed radical at the time, but would pale in comparison to the final…
Shotgun Golf with Bill Murray By Hunter S. Thompson Thompson’s final piece of writing, in which he runs an idea for a new sport —combining golf and shotguns — by comedy legend Bill Murray at 3:30 in the morning. The death of professional hockey in AMERICA is a nasty omen for people with heavy investments…
by Sabrina Orah Mark… A lot of my friends are following the Rabbi so I start following the Rabbi too. We follow him into a community swimming pool and splash around. Our suits match. Light blue with moons and stars. Read the Flashbyte… FLASHBYTES: THE WHOLE STORY IN 5 MINUTES OR LESS. Sabrina…
by Smoochily Philly… “My wife was on my computer and she found the pages from SuperSexySexEscorts.com in my browsing history. She was just sitting there, waiting, when I walked into the room.” Read the rest of the story… Philip Loyd loves fat chicks and cheap beer, though not necessarily in that order. Loyd…
by Tobias Wolff… Anders couldn’t get to the bank until just before it closed, so of course the line was endless and he got stuck behind two women whose loud, stupid conversation put him in a murderous temper. Read the rest of the story,,, Tobias Wolff is the author of the novels The Barracks…
by Jake Wickenhofer… Her eyes take the longest. He spends a full hour completing them. Whenever I look into them, it is as though I can see every second of her life leading up to the moment in which my brother captured her. He must have seen her somewhere, I think to myself. Read the…
by Jacuzzying Philly… “I like to go to the hot tub at the Holiday Inn down by the airport. There are always lovely ladies there. I think they’re stewardesses, although they’ve never really said for sure. They’re always so happy, like they’re on vacation; but who vacations at the Holiday Inn down by the airport?”…
