#philiployd #realwritersmarket “Well, at least she’s no damn Yankee,” said Mother, and that was the closest thing to a compliment I was ever going to get. “That girl, while you were at Princeton, the one with the, the nose, you know, the…” “The Jewish girl,” I said. “Don’t you use that tone with me,” said…
#philiployd #realwritersmarket I went over to my friend Norton Throssberg’s house the other day to watch the Big Game. You remember Norton. He’s the guy who discovered our sister planet Eden in the Polaris 9876 Solar System in the Andromeda Galaxy. Wait, that doesn’t happen until the year 3085. Anyway. Read the whole story… …
by Turkey Philly, from a story told to him by Dr. Mark Newcomb, PhD… Every day in America, twenty-seven people are killed in drunk driving accidents. For a nation of over three hundred million, that might not seem like a lot; but that’s almost ten thousand people every year. That’s more than the average small…
#philiployd #realwritersmarket I was talking to someone in the park the other day. No one important, just some old man who came and sat down on the bench beside me. “All thinking men,” he told me, “are atheists.” “So does that mean,” I said, “that everyone who believes in God is an idiot?” “Not necessarily,”…
#philiployd #realwritersmarket “Just deport ‘em all,” I said. “Ship ‘em off to some desert island somewhere.” “Just like that?” said José. José is my good friend from Mexico. “Just like that.” I said. “That’s your solution?” said José. “Deport them?” “Yes,” I said. “Deport them. Deport them all.” José was not happy with my solution,…
#philiployd #realwritersmarket I hate being human. I hate traffic, I hate politics, and I hate TV. Most of all though, I hate having to have a job? So I did it; I became a dog. It was a lot easier than you’d think. All I had to do was strip off my clothes and off…
