Ain’t Marriage Grand?

by Hornily Philly… I always wanted to be rich. I always wanted to have a beautiful wife. I never thought I’d have either. But guess what? Yep. I got both. Although the life is not all it’s cracked up to be, you’ll never guess in a million years how it all turned out for me.…

Somebody’s Poisoning Me

by Dying Philly… Somebody’s poisoning me. I can feel it. It wouldn’t be the first time. For years now, someone’s been out to get me. Maybe it’s somebody in my family; maybe it’s even the maid. Maybe it’s because I’m stinking rich. Maybe. Read the whole story…            

Southern Girl

by Whistling-Dixie Philly… “Well, at least she’s no damn Yankee,” said Mother, and that was the closest thing to a compliment I was ever going to get.  “That girl, while you were at Princeton, the one with the, the nose, you know, the…” “The Jewish girl,” I said. “Don’t you use that tone with me,”…

The Time Machine

by Timelessly Philly… I went over to my friend Norton Throssberg’s house the other day to watch the Big Game.  You remember Norton.  He’s the guy who discovered our sister planet Eden in the Polaris 9876 Solar System in the Andromeda Galaxy.  Wait, that doesn’t happen until the year 3085.  Anyway. Read the whole story……

The Two-Ton Brick

by Universally Philly… I was talking to someone in the park the other day.  No one important, just some old man who came and sat down on the bench beside me.  “All thinking men,” he told me, “are atheists.” “So does that mean,” I said, “that everyone who believes in God is an idiot?” “Not…

Focus on Fiction – Interview with Author Philip Loyd

Philip Loyd is now doing interviews, of all things. That’s right, your exalted founder Philip Loyd is in this month’s issue of Focus on Fiction, with Nancy Christie. Come check out the crazy interview with your fellow Flashbytes author on  “Short Takes: Interviews with Short Story Writers.” Read it now at NancyChristie.com.      …

Illegal Aliens

by Felipe Philly… “Just deport ‘em all,” I said. “Ship ‘em off to some desert island somewhere.” “Just like that?” said José. José is my good friend from Mexico. “Just like that.” I said. “That’s your solution?” said José. “Deport them?” “Yes,” I said. “Deport them. Deport them all.” José was not happy with my…

Jo-Jo: The Dog-Faced Boy

by Doggedly Philly… I hate being human. I hate traffic, I hate politics, and I hate TV. Most of all though, I hate having to have a job? So I did it; I became a dog. It was a lot easier than you’d think. All I had to do was strip off my clothes and…

The Mother of All Cars

by Overbearingly Philly… When Donald R. “Dobie” Dobiemeyer won the grand prize—the first ever so-called “Mother of All Cars” from Universal Motors—he knew he was in for the ride of his life.  What he didn’t know was exactly what kind of ride that would be. Read the whole story…            …

The At-Home, Do-It-Yourself, Brain Surgery Kit

by Mentally Philly… I always wanted to be a brain surgeon.  Who wouldn’t?  Brain surgeons make tons of dough.  They live in mansions and have beautiful wives.  They are in essence, rock stars. Wanting to be a brain surgeon is one thing, becoming one is quite another.  When I discovered how much hard work it…