by Carnivorously Philly… “Raspberry, or strawberry, those are my favorite flavor jelly donuts. Maybe lemon, but never peach. And wouldn’t you know, that’s just the flavor she had on, peach? The edible panties, I mean. They were teeny and tight and not much more than a light snack. I hate peach.” Read the whole story……

by Homicidally Philly… Oh, my God. I just killed Billy Joel. The Piano Man. The Stranger. Captain Jack. He was lying right there in the middle of the road, his motorcycle in ruins. Dead as a doornail. At least, I think he’s dead. He’s not moving. He’s not responding. There’s blood everywhere. Sweet Jesus, what…

by Uniformly Philly… Then it happened. It finally happened. He finally found his calling. He really did. He finally found a uniform he could stick with. Before I tell you what his calling was though, there’s something you should know first. Read the whole penniless story… FLASHBYTES: THE WHOLE STORY IN 5 MINUTES OR LESS.…

by Thirsty Philly… “Hi, my name is Jon. That’s right, Jon, without the H. No, I’m not pretentious; I’m an alcoholic. Today is my birthday. Today, I’m 365 days sober. It’s been exactly one year to the day since my last drink. One year since I’ve driven drunk. One year since I’ve blacked out. One…

by Lecherously Philly… “The Minks TV News Network was the highest-rated game in town. Its boss, Landon Lech, not only had fifty years under his belt, he knew the industry like nobody’s business. “Lech knew exactly what the American public wanted to see. That’s precisely why, in an industry dominated by left-wing agitators, Lech founded…

by Rusty Philly… I found this strange, dusty-old circular thingy in my dad’s garage the other day. At first I thought it was a Frisbee, but there was nowhere to grab hold of it. If you tried catching it, it might just slice your fingers off. Needless to say, it wasn’t a Frisbee. “That’s a…

by Fisticuffs Philly… “All of a sudden a barroom broke out. How do you know when a barroom brawl breaks out? It’s just like in the movies. First, a chair gets kicked out. Then, someone breaks a bottle in half. Then, arms start spinning around like airplane propellers. It all happens in just a matter…

by Litigiously Philly… “I’ve been watching a lot of TV lately. Go figure. All these attacks. Everywhere. It got me to thinking: If that rabble-rouser with the comb-over can go on and on about suing everybody, why can’t I? Makes sense to me. The thing is, I’ve got a real case.” Read the whole indefensible…

by Rock N Rolly Philly… I’m from the Rock N Roll Universe.  Ever heard of it? It’s a place where nothing else matters except the music.  Rock N Roll music. One night in the Rock N Roll Universe a woman awoke to her baby crying.  “Damn kids!” she cursed. “This is it,” she told her…

by Fanatically Philly… After the EURO 2016 soccer riots in France, UEFA officials decided to do something about it. While some cited economic woes as the cause, handing out wads of cash was quickly voted down. What they did wind up proposing seemed radical at the time, but would pale in comparison to the final…